Musings...

Hey there 2012. I realise you've been here for a while, now – but I've been on holidays. (Well, that's my story, and I'm sticking to it.) And hey there, froggy blends (ahem)... bloggy friends. Welcome back (to you, and to me). You probably wondered if I'd disappeared last year? Good news! However it's come about, I seem to be back at the keyboard. Blogging my art.

In one way, I knew I would be. You see... it's an imperative: the art; the writing about the art; and, hence, these blog posts you've come to know and love. (Hush now, and take a seat.) Hang on just a jiffy. I'll put some music on for you —

Gregory Alan Isakov - 3 am (Lyrics)

Okay. Let's begin.

This is about a feeling. I don't know if you're familiar with this one, but if you are, you'll know what I'm talking about. Sometimes I realise there's something that I Simply Must Do. The judge's decision is final. No correspondence will be entered into. DO NOT PASS GO. Do not collect two hundred dollars (shame about the money). "Resistance is futile."

If any of you have had a great creative idea attack without warning at three in the morning (and if you're anything like me), you probably know that you need to at least jot it down – since getting back to sleep, without doing that, is a lost cause. Fighting against these imperatives consumes more energy than allowing the creative flow to happen when it will. And, anyway, if you fight your own creative Muse, she'll just be an obstreperous pain in the butt until you surrender to her demands. Humble acquiescence is a much wiser path. So, these days, I choose not to swim against the tide when I experience those, "I need to draw/write – now!" moments.

The Kiss of the Muse — Paul Cezanne (c. 1860)

Do you recognise this feeling?
Thought you might.

Okay, then. The next bit...

Apparently, it's over 10,000 miles from here to Providence, Rhode Island, USA. More, when you don't fly crow–wise (which I didn't). So why did I undertake this journey of Ulyssean proportions? The answer is simple...

I had to.

I knew that I was going to study Zentangle® teacher training with Rick and Maria in the USA. So I surrendered to the will of my personal Muse. Here I am. Surrendering. (I look pretty happy about it, too!)

Kit, with Rick and Maria — Providence, Rhode Island

It was one of those, "Okay! I'll do it! (Now, may I have some sleep?)" moments. Should I have waited until a more 'sensible' time... delayed until the 'time was right'... waited to be 'practical' and 'rational' about it? Sure... sometimes that's the answer... but not always. And not this time.

So, at the end of September, I packed up (the night before), and spent 25+ hours flying from Australia to the East Coast of America. And now (well since last October) I'm a CZT. A Certified Zentangle® Teacher. (If you tangle, and you know it, clap your hands. And then stop clapping, and get yourself off to CZT training. I guarantee you'll have fun!)

Sometimes you just need to grab life
with both hands,

take the dream, 

and make it real.

Risk it! Create it! Live it!

So there you have it. Life, or our creative muse, or fate occasionally taps us on the shoulder and simply tells us what's happening next. And this part of my life, this journey of faith, if you will – it was just like that – I knew... utterly, completely, surely, and certainly, that this was where I was going.

Do I know what life has in store for me tomorrow... the day after... next year? Nope! Don't need to. I've learned not to question or over-analyse the future too much. My friend, Michelle, said that attending this seminar was like life giving us "serendipity on a stick." Well, who am I to question that?

So, I'm living it out. Swimming with the current. I'm claiming my artistic, working art studio dream. I'm grabbing it by the throat, and making it mine. I'm starting by tangling every day. (I'm posting my progress on Facebook to motivate me to add at least something more each day.) And right now? Well, I'm sitting at the beginning of Day Three. About to pick up my pen....

At the end of Day One (click image to embiggen) 

---

"Many of us spend our whole lives running from feeling, with the mistaken belief

that you cannot bear the pain. But you have already borne the pain. 

What you have not done is feel all you are beyond the pain." — Saint Bartholomew

Life in Letters...

There are so many times in our lives when we don't quite know where to begin. (Writing this blog post was one of them.) Maria von Trapp would suggest we start at the very beginning (a very good place to start) with Do Re Mi. Unless it's the alphabet, in which case, like Rick and Maria's beautiful tile this week, you start with "A"...

But sometimes, what we endeavour to do seems so incredibly daunting that we simply can't seem to begin. Of course ("journey of a thousand miles" and all that), we will eventually have to take that first step. That 'leap of faith.' (Or, as I like to say, "get over yourself, Kit, and just do it!") But why is it so scary to just start? Somewhere. Anywhere...

(Click image to embiggen)

It's a simple answer, really. We're not living in the present moment. We're firmly and emotionally entrenched in a fictional future. We look at what we have set out to do... and two things are usually happening. First, we have an attachment to the outcome. We want a 'certain something' to happen, to exist, to develop, to appear. Second, we're worried about stuffing that up. It's natural. It's normal. It's ridiculous!

We. Haven't. Even. Begun and we're frightened of what might happen if...

That's all, just an "if" (no "buts" about it).
There are many clever definitions of FEAR in this context.
Here are a few:

F.E.A.R.

• Future Events Appearing Real
• False Expectations Appearing Real
• Finding Excuses And Reasons
• Failure Expected And Remembered
• Frantic Effort to Avoid Reality

but my personal favourite would have to be:

Forgetting Everything is All Right

Because we do forget that. I'll say it again. Everything is All Right. We need to breathe, relax, and remember that. Of course, things don't always feel "all right"... acknowledged. But, except in the midst of immediate and present wrongness, they usually are.

Think about it. Where are you right now? Oh, I know, I know! You're sitting at a screen reading Kit's blog post. Good... that's sorted (and clearly "all right"). Are you in immediate need of shelter or food that you don't have access to? Are you injured badly? (Probably not, if you're still reading.) Are you in immediate physical danger? No? Ah...

Well... regardless of emotional turmoils (which we all experience from time to time)... I want you to do something very physical and grounding.

Feel your feet on the ground. Push at it a bit. Not moving? Good. That's "all right." Feel your body breathing. Are you breathing? Breathe a bit more definitely, so you can feel it. Yep - that's "all right" too. So... let's take it from there.

You're alive. Breathing. Not in immediate danger of any kind. You can feel the earth solid beneath your feet. Just feel all that. Know it. Know it deep, and sure, and certain. And breathe that knowledge out around you. Wrap yourself in it and (yes, I'm going to make you do it) repeat after me: "Everything is all right." Not convinced? Say it again. Out loud. (Yes, people may look at you strangely... I don't care... and neither do you - riiight?)

Everything is All Right

Okay... now to begin.
You don't start at the end.
You don't need to start with a result or an outcome.
You only need start.
Any kind of beginning will do.

Let's start up some music, shall we? (No, I hadn't forgotten, Shelly. [grin])

That's a start.

If you're starting something that you understand may not be easy, then do what I do. Start (and finish) something else. Something small and quick. Something you know you can do... with sure and utter certainty. For me that's a Zentangle. It's only going to take about 15 minutes (if I'm not attached to the outcome, of course), and I know I will succeed. Before I start. What a treat! What a buzz! What a confidence boost!

If you don't know how to tangle (yet), then make a cup of tea, or take a photograph of your feet, or whistle a nursery rhyme... whatever works for you. Whatever you know you can't fail to succeed at. And enjoy succeeding. And, when you're done. Appreciate what you've done. "Go me!" And, for future reference, you really ought to try your hand at Zentangle for this. Yes... all of you. [smile]

I finally finished a commission that I'd been having difficulty with... mostly because, the more I drew, the more I would potentially lose if I 'stuffed up' (yep, I Forgot Everything was All Right). But finish it I did. "Go me!" So here I am, sharing it with you (this blog, ostensibly being about drawing primarily... though philosophical musings are becoming a habit [grin]).

A new beginning.
A commission for Jenny's beautiful daughter, Nova.
(Click image to embiggen)

What do you think? Talk to me.
Or tell me about something that you made a start on today...

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